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Things You Probably Like, Which I Hate

May 21, 2010

Ha! Such fun. Stolen from Tammie.

With the caveat that many of the things I love, I am sure many people hate, I present to you my list:

1. Short stories. I am just not a fan, despite many tries and the valiant attempts of favorite authors to tempt me. I can’t even read Neil Gaiman short stories. The only collection I have enjoyed recently was Dreams Underfoot by Charles de Lint, and that’s only because they were completely linked by the town of Newford and many of the same characters showed up in the stories, and many of the events were referenced, so it felt more like a book. I just get irritated at short stories. Too condensed. Not enough pages. Sometimes too profound or too precious. I just can’t get on the short-story train.

2. Starbucks. I don’t like anything about Starbucks. I hate their coffee, I hate their whole take-over-the-world business model, I hate the canned music they play and I really hate the fact that they offer pre-mixed themed CDs for sale at the counter, especially at the holidays when everyone is lined up for crappy peppermint mochas. The only thing I like about Starbucks is every once in awhile they have good mugs for sale, but honestly Peet’s (local chain) has better mugs and better coffee, and outstanding tea. (that said, I’ll drink it in a pinch, but I’d rather have Peet’s or Stumptown or Peaberry’s or even diner coffee anytime)

3. Talk radio. I went through a brief period a few months ago where I could listen to it and enjoy it, but now I’m back to hating it. I don’t want to listen to people talk. Blah blah blah, blah blah. I know Car Talk is funny and NPR has great stories and KPFA is a local bastion of independent liberal radio, but I just don’t enjoy it. Usually.

4. Aside from being mostly-veg, I’m really not that picky about food but I really hate grocery store cakes. You know, those big sheet cakes with horribly thick frosting. I am not a fan of frosting and I’m really not a fan of bad cake. I don’t understand why people buy these. I guess it makes sense for an office celebration, but it’s just crap cake for at home or a party.

Oh, I also don’t really care for most sandwiches. Too much bread. What a pain to assemble. Exception: grilled cheese.

5. Going out for breakfast. What a hassle. I love breakfast food, but you can make a pretty awesome breakfast at home with no problem, and in your jammies to boot. Thankfully I don’t ever really go out to breakfast, but I’d so much rather have a really yummy breakfast at home in my comfies with a giant book or the newspaper. Crowds and having to drive and park and wait and pay… not what I want to do first thing in the morning. Having someone MAKE me breakfast… now THAT I support. Fully.

6. Sitting in the sun. I can’t do it for more than a few minutes. I get too hot, I burn, I get a headache. I’m a delicate flower.

7. Chick Lit. As usual (because I am rarely black-and-white about anything) there are a few exceptions, but I really can’t stand those shopping/rom-com/lightweight/fluffy chick lit books. I also can’t stand most romance novels, although I really would like to find an exception to that.

8. Parties. (although I really enjoy planning parties) Especially baby showers, wedding showers, or any party involving more than about 10 people.

9. Smarm-rock. You know what I mean. Train. Dave Matthews. Hootie. Middle-of-the-road jam bands. Also: smooth jazz, , John Mayer, etc. Gag.

10. Ummmm…. This was harder than I expected. I think I would have a much easier time coming up with things that I like that I wouldn’t expect others to like. I think when I dislike something I pretty much avoid it and put it out of my mind. Also, I tend not to think in absolutes. But this was fun to think about.

12 Comments leave one →
  1. May 21, 2010 6:05 pm

    I was just going to comment on #6, but then decided to go into all of them. 🙂
    I’ve read some good short story collections but your comment about many being too profound or too precious is not wrong.
    I like Starbucks Caramel Apple Cider but I only get it if other people I’m with want to go to Starbucks. I don’t like drinking coffee or tea so distinctions between coffeeshops are lost on me.
    I listen to NPR almost every day, but I can’t stand talk-shows featuring radio personalities.
    I’m with you there on store-cake frosting. Always too much and icky.
    My sister and I used to go out for breakfast once a week when we were working retail in Bar Harbor, Maine. It was a lot of fun and also a more affordable way to eat out.
    Yeah, I can’t really like sitting in the sun, but I like being near a window.
    Not a huge chick lit fan but they can be fun.
    I can like baby and wedding showers if I know many of the people there already.
    Heh, I like the term ‘smarm rock.’ I usually hate Train but they surprised me with the Soul Sister song which is just really catchy. And ew, John Mayer.

  2. May 21, 2010 7:33 pm

    i despise john mayer. i truly truly hate him. always have. ugh.

    i dont enjoy going out for breakfast either. mainly because in the morning all i want is coffee and to be left alone for a bit. now brunch, i loooooove brunch.

    i generally dont like short stories either. they are usually far too open ended and i always end up wanting more. i hate that unfulfilled feeling.

  3. May 21, 2010 7:56 pm

    Christy: I agree, baby showers can be fun if you know everybody… but usually I don’t and so they aren’t fun. But I have been to a few that have been enjoyable.

    Tammie: ooh, yes. Brunch is a different thing altogether. Especially brunch at a bakery-type place with a sunny back patio… But Sunday morning waffles with a bunch of hipsters? No thank you. Although there are exceptions. As always.

    I was thinking about the short story thing today and realized that as much as I hate them, if I ever took a creative writing class I would probably end up writing a few short stories. Sigh. Irony.

  4. Lua permalink
    May 21, 2010 10:45 pm

    Great list!
    Short Stories & Starbucks are two of my all time favorites 🙂
    But there is no way I can stand under the sun longer than five minutes- I’ll melt! In summer when it gets over 10000 degrees in Istanbul, you can always see me looking for a shadow to hide from the sun!
    What I hate but you probably like? Wine! Can’t stand the smell of it, hate how it tastes… I’m a beer kind of girl 😉

  5. Lara Starr permalink
    May 21, 2010 11:00 pm

    Love this list! Don’t agree with all – but love it!

    1. Short stories – generally like. Liked Interpreter of Maladies more more than The Namsake, and love Frank O’Hara

    2. Starbucks – hate for all the reasons you list. Hate precious coffee drinks – I’m a black cuppa joe kinda dame

    3. Talk radio – love, and it pays my rent 😉

    4. Safeway cakes are hell – but what I REALLY had is boxed mix and canned frosting. Why not just buy a grocery store cake rather than make a gross one?

    4a. I love samis, and wraps – but who decided focaccia was sandwich bread?

    5. Going out for breakfast – one of those things I think I like, but usually don’t

    6. Sitting in the sun – word.

    7. Chick Lit – agrees

    8. Parties – I love showers, but hate parties that are too loud, too big, too small (though I love just hanging around and talking with a group of 5-6 people) or where the host makes no effort

    9. Smarm-rock. – HATE! Also hate wailing women folk/pop/rock/whatever

    10. Ummmm…. This was harder than I expected. I think I would have a much easier time coming up with things that I like that I wouldn’t expect others to like. I think when I dislike something I pretty much avoid it and put it out of my mind. Also, I tend not to think in absolutes. But this was fun to think about.

    Things You Probably Like, Which I Hate:

    1) Gardening – dirt, sun, stooping – you can keep it. I also have complicated feelings about both houseplants and cut flowers.

    2) Indian Food – curry is the grossest smelling thing ever. There’s a woman who’s desk is behind mine who eats curry every day. I’d give her a pass if she were Indian or Thai. She’s not.

    3) Camping – so much work to get ready for a long drive, followed by more work setting up, uncomfortable bed and 2-3 days of being filthy. Not to mention all of those neighbors at the camp site. All to have a long drive home and more work cleaning it all up and putting it away.

    4) Breakfast in Bed – I feel like a tool sitting there staring at the wall. And of course, as soon as I get set up I have to go to the bathroom.

    5) Live Theater – one of those things I think I like, but I don’t. I LOVE musical numbers, and movie musicals, but something about live theater is a little too… intimate? No matter what’s coming out of their mouths, I can only hear those needbag actors saying “Love me, LOVE me, LOVE ME!”

    6) Foreign Movies – this a a broad generalization, and British doesn’t count as foreign, but most are boring and the actors look weird.

    7) Hiking and Biking – I don’t know how they let me live in Marin, but I don’t like tramping around in nature

    8) Twitter – annoying and unwieldy. I’m gonna throw texting in here as well

    9) Apple products. I mean, they’re fine, but I don’t get all ga-ga over them. There are plenty of products that do the same thing for less money and without all of the “I’m so cool” attitude

    10) Wine – I don’t not like wine, I just have no palette for it. I’m happy with Two Buck Chuck and can go months without having alcohol at all.

  6. May 22, 2010 1:52 am

    We only really disagree on #1 😛

    What makes parties so meh for me is the fact that the pressure to have a food time so often kills the fun. I can’t remember the last time I actually had fun at a party. Is that sad?

  7. May 22, 2010 10:18 am

    Oh, these are great comments!

    I don’t really like wine either. I drink so rarely that it doesn’t really matter, but I can literally only have 2-3 sips before it starts to turn to vinegar in my mouth. Yuck. I do without alcohol in general, pretty much.

    I *wish* I liked short stories and talk radio. I get bored with both WAY too quickly.

    There is no excuse for Starbucks crappiness. They have a shitload of money: make good coffee.

    Lara: your list is terrific and well-documented. I know better than to ever offer you anything with curry in it!! 🙂

    Ana: I know. I try to have a good time at parties, but I really don’t. I’m a wallflower who talks about the weather. Sad. I do like dinner parties, however. With about 8 people. Or 6 = even better.

  8. May 22, 2010 1:21 pm

    I like short stories but I really have to be in the right frame of mind for them, hence I don’t read them often. I like Starbucks when I’m shopping at Barnes and Noble. Their soy mochas (no whip!) are the tastiest of all the chains (Caribou makes me gag and Dunn Bros is meh). Starbucks was also the only place in London (10 years ag0) that had soymilk. I love NPR but I don’t consider them talk radio. I listen in the mornings to the news over breakfast. Haven’t had a grocery store cake in over 15 years since they aren’t vegan, but yeah, recall them being pretty gross.

    I love going out to breakfast! Only do it every couple of months, but our favorite veg diner has loads of vegan choices and stuff we wouldn’t make at home and if you showed up in your pjs no one would look twice at you.

    Sun, I like for short periods of time of less than half an hour. Longer than that I burn.

    With you 100% on the chicklit, parties and smarm rock 🙂

  9. May 24, 2010 2:10 am

    What a list. I’m agree with you in almost every point.
    Esp having someone make us breakfast. I really need that kind of person to take care all the mess every morning. 🙂

    “I’m a delicate flower”. ohhh.. You are honey, LoL

    I hate Chick Lit also. I hate how the authors always describe woman as a creature that only think about shopping/rom-com/lightweight/fluffy.
    And why they all look so stupid?

    Wait for another post from you..


  10. Theresa permalink
    May 24, 2010 12:28 pm

    He he he, I loved your list. I don’t do the whole starbucks thing either. We don’t even have one here, but shhhh… don’t tell them that. We have a local bakery/coffee shop called Sugar Rush that has really great teas, but their coffee is also suck-tacular. Go figure.

    I hate grocery store cakes too. The only thing I can figure is that people buy them because they are “pretty.” We always got homemade cakes on our birthdays growing up, so I’m kinda partial to “ugly” but yummy cake. LOL

    I don’t like wedding/baby showers either because of the whole “traditional/shmomitional” standard attached to them. The baby shower for my first baby was uncomfortable FOR ME because I didn’t know half the people there and there was all this fru-fru crap going on. For my last baby shower I invited all the men too and we grilled and drank margaritas (virgin for me obviously) and didn’t do any of that crap. LOL

    I’m with you on everything really except sitting in the sun. I love it, and I rarely ever burn. Laying in the sun is one of my vices.

  11. May 25, 2010 10:45 am

    I wonder if there is a connection between not liking short stories and not liking talk radio, particularly NPR? Essentially most of what makes NPR enjoyable are short stories. You don’t get much, but they do a good job of trying to make a point or an emotional connection in the short amount of time allotted to them. I’m thinking of the wonderful program This American Life in particular. Just a thought.

    Can’t believe you cannot even get into Neil’s short stories! He’s a master of the genre. Which just goes to prove that you know yourself well and that you are dead on when you say that you don’t like short stories. Ha! 🙂

  12. May 26, 2010 6:57 pm

    Loved everybody’s comments… I know I have a defect because I don’t love short stories and/or NPR, but oh well.

    I’ll have Starbucks in a pinch but I never *love* it. Peet’s is sooo much better. Or my trusty New Orleans style chicory coffee. That’s my favorite. In the red can!

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